Women are hard to understand. I know this not only from my own experiences with dating, relationships, and casual flings, but also because I’ve heard lady friends of mine say it about other ladies! What comes off as obvious, or duh, or even common sense isn’t always the case. People, not just women, often expect others to be able to read their thoughts, ideas, and secrets without moving their mouth. Barring some sort of drastic technological development, mind reading isn’t an option when trying to understand someone else. Thankfully, here’s a list of secrets women actually want their men to know.
1. “E” is for effort
Plain and simple, most men don’t have enough of it outside the bedroom. It goes a lot further than taking out the trash or holding the door open for her when you’re out and about. When a woman lets you into her life it’s a very important and sensual thing. It should be highly cherished. Doing something really special for no reason, or finding a creative way to make her day better or more special will go a long way with her. The hardest part isn’t winning the chase for her affection, but keeping it.
2. Chivalry is not in the obituaries
There’s this loosely celebrated relationship faux pas that “chivalry is dead.” That’s funny. When friends or acquaintances say that, what you’re actually hearing is, “I’m extremely lazy and self centred.” Now, dudes, before you get out your pitchforks and fire torches and try to run me out of town (or tell me it’s an “equality” thing) – just stop. You should be 100% proud of your lady, though I think it’s unhealthy to make her the centre of your entire world. It’s crucial that you show her consistently how much she means to you. This isn’t necessarily done verbally with an overwhelming shower of “I love you.” I’ll even go to say it’s not about holding the door, saying please or thank you, or even being kind to others, but those are all encouraged. Do you remember when your lady said, “Hey. I like when you do [x]?” Yeah, do that. Paying attention to her is the purest form of chivalry.
3. Shhhhhhhh. Listen
I’m kind of picking on guys in the majority of this, but to do so on this bullet point isn’t entirely fair. Everyone can be pretty awful at listening. However, this is a big secret women want us to understand: we don’t listen enough. Our way of decompressing is grabbing a happy hour beer after work with buddies or hitting the sticks (video game lingo) with our virtual friends in Korea. Though some women prefer both of those things the majority just want to talk about their crappy day, or lacklustre boss, or friend who’s a bridezilla. It’s often played off as a joke in pop culture, but you should want to listen to her. It’s never a chore because you love her.
4. They’re extremely intuitive
They have a better idea of what you’re feeling most times than you do, gents. Women are just like that. Well, it’s largely based on an innate ability women have to better read nonverbal communication than you. Therefore, based on your body language, eyes, hands, feet, stance, posture, and a myriad of other characteristics about you they’ve closely, but unconsciously studied during your time dating, they know when you’re lying. They know when you’re deceitful. They usually know when you’re cheating. Don’t cheat them, both figuratively and literally. They’ll know.